Are You Optimistic Enough?


Happy Monday! Let’s Be Optimistic and Make It Great!

I Can Do It

But, can we really, you know, do it? Life can get us down, but it is up to us, to keep it together. Now, I am living witness of not being optimistic the last few months. It brings me to shame to, because I’m a Sagittarius and being optimistic is one our main traits. I used to be very optimistic until life started to show me that everything that glittered was not gold. I mean, I wanted it to be gold, well, I would rather that it was. But, let’s face it, the world does not work our way, which leads me to being more optimistic about life.

We often focus on the things that happen and are not working in our lives that we forget how blessed we truly are. Not to get all religious on you, but the bible says, ” When you are grateful for little, he will bless you with more.” This has been my new approach of late, being happy where I am. I have a roof over my head and food in my mouth. Things will get better in time.

Being More Optimistic

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The term optimistic means, ” hopeful and feeling confident for the future”.  Understand that you are not your circumstances or your struggle.  This also has to do with our mindset as well. Check out my post about having a positive mindset. Here are some ways that you can work on your optimism. I got some help from Wiki on how to be optimistic.
1. Recognize the good and bad in your life and examine how you’ve been affected by each. Optimism doesn’t mean you have to feel “happy” all the time. In fact, trying to force feelings of happiness during potentially traumatic experiences can be unhealthy.  Instead, attune yourself to the full range of emotions in your life, accepting that the negative as well as positive feelings are a natural part of human experience. Trying to repress a certain type of emotion can cause severe emotional distress. Not focusing more on one type of emotion than the other can actually help you become more adaptive and proactive in future unexpected situations. This will increase your ability to be optimistic and resilient in the face of uncertainty.
Negative feelings can become a conditioned habit over time. Avoid blaming yourself for negative emotions and associations. Blame is unhelpful because it doesn’t look forward to how you can grow; it looks backward at what has already happened.
Instead, focus on being mindful of when these negative emotions occur. A journal could help you do this. Write down when you experience negative feelings or thoughts, then examine their contexts and explore alternative ways of responding to them.
For example, imagine that someone cuts you off in traffic. You respond by feeling angry, honking your horn, and perhaps yelling at the driver even though s/he can’t hear you. You could write in your journal what happened, how it made you feel, and what your immediate response was. Don’t judge yourself as “right” or “wrong,” just write down what happened.
Next, take a step back and think about what you’ve written. Was your response in accordance with your values and the type of person you want to be? If not, what could you have done differently? What do you think you were really responding to? For example, perhaps you weren’t really angry at the driver; maybe you had a stressful day and allowed your stress to explode on that one person.
Look forward when you write these entries. Don’t use them just as a place to wallow in negative feelings. Think about what you can learn from the experience. What can you use to grow as a person? Can you use this experience to inform other experiences? If you encounter a similar situation next time, how might you respond in a way that is in line with your values? For example, perhaps realizing that you responded with anger because of your stressful day could help you realize that everyone makes mistakes and encourage you to feel more empathetic with other people the next time someone shows anger toward you. Having a pre-existing idea of how you want to respond to negative situations can also help you in the tough moments.

2. Practice mindfulness. Mindfulness is a key component of optimism because it encourages you to focus on acknowledging your emotions in the moment without judging them. Often, negative reactions arise when we try to struggle against our feelings, or when we allow ourselves to become so blinded by our emotions that we forget that we can control how we respond to them.  Focusing on your breathing, accepting your body and your feelings, and learning from your emotions rather than denying them can help you become comfortable with yourself, which is important when those negative emotions arise.
Mindfulness meditation has been shown by many studies to help with feelings of anxiety and depression. It can actually reprogram the way your body responds to stress.
Look for mindfulness meditation classes in your community. You can also find guided meditations online, such as at the UCLA Mindful Awareness Research Center[16] or BuddhaNet  (And of course, there are several great tutorials on Wikihow.)
You don’t have to commit a huge amount of time to meditation to see its effects. Just a few minutes a day can help you become more aware and accepting of your emotions.[18]

3. Identify whether your inner monologue is an optimist or a pessimist. Our inner monologue is a great indicator of whether we naturally take a positive or negative outlook on life. Pay attention to your inner monologue over the course of a day and see if any of the following forms of negative self-talk (that is, your inner monologue) are appearing regularly:
Magnifying the negative aspects of a situation and filtering out all of the positive ones.
Automatically blaming yourself for any negative situation or event.
Anticipating the worst in any given situation. The drive-through coffee shop gets your order wrong and you automatically think that the rest of your day will be a disaster.
You see things only as good or bad (also known as polarization). In your eyes, there is no middle ground.

4. Look for the positives in your life. It’s important to re-orient your inner monologue to focus on the positive aspects of both you as an individual and the world around you. Although positive thinking is only one of the steps towards becoming a true optimist, the effects of positive thinking for both your body and mind can be significant, such as:
Increased life span
Lower rates of depression
Lower levels of distress
Improved immune system
Better psychological and physical well-being
Reduced risk of death from cardiovascular disease
Better coping skills during hardships and times of stress

Some of these situations I witness first hand, especially depression. But, now I have a renewed mindset and better control of knowing I can’t worry about things out of my control. Daily, it is good to speak positive affirmations and surround yourself with positive people. I hope that these tips have helped you a lot as it has for me.

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You Are Not Your Struggle


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Happy Sunday!

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As I was reflecting and thinking about my life,  wondering where I want to be, this topic came to mind. There are many of us who are struggling, and feel like we don’t know where to turn or what to do with our lives. Trust me, I’ve been there and I’m still there.  Struggle doesn’t last always even though we fill it might. This can be affecting your personal, work, or even relationships with friends and family. Don’t allow it to get your down. The rapper T.I states, ” Tough situations don’t last, but tough people do.”   When I read his quote in an interview, I thought, ” He is so right! I am wallowing for nothing.”

The above picture reminds me of where I am and possible a lot of you are. You notice the man with the briefcase as he’s walking. He has a goal, somewhere to be! He’s not looking backward, even through his struggles are following him. He is still pressing on, so why can’t we? What is it about us as people that focus on not being where we want to be instead of appreciating where we are headed? This made me think! Here is what I came up with.

  1. Other Influences – We live in a society today where the media is booming with successful people. It is almost like successful people are throwing in our faces that we are not where we want to be. We focus on that and feel miserable. Well, not anymore! If we focus on what is important and just our goals, we will strive forward.
  2. Telling Our Goals –  Before you judge me with this one, please hear me out. Now, there is nothing wrong with telling someone who has their best interest for you about your goals. But, when you expose it to everyone, everyone does not have your best interest at hear. I know what you must be thinking, ” Who cares what people think?” Actually, some of us do. We as people need gratification and praises of other people, other wise we would do what we choose without having to tell anyone. My point is everything in our lives is not for everyone. Some people want to see us fail and not succeed sadly.
  3. Monitoring Others  – I used to focus on what my friends and other people that I knew was doing. I was envious of their success and them doing things that I wanted to do like travel, write for a major corporation, even down to marriage and children. Focusing on them was taking me off my square for me to be happy. Don’t allow this to happen. Be happy for your friends and associates. Your time will come. When it comes, it maybe even better than what others had going on.

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It’s been said by many people that our struggle is what keeps us going. People are often stagnant when they are comfortable. Could their be truth to this? I think it depends on how bad the person wants to be their best selves. The picture above really captivated and resonated with me because the ball in chain is holding him back, but he is moving through this struggle. It’s almost as if his struggle is keeping him coming. Being able to move on says a lot about your character. Don’t sweat the small stuff and I know it maybe hard, but try no to worry about things that are out of your control. Life is too short. Work with your struggle, do not become your struggle.

Dream Deferred


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At times in life, our life shifts into different directions that are out of our control. Today I experienced a shift that totally not only knocked me off my feet, but again the wall so hard that I can’t move. Trying to find a job in the writing and research field is hard enough ( hell, a job period), but finding out that you can no longer get the education to continue to try to be on the way of success is a hard blow. I found out that I can’t finish pursuing my PhD. On this blog, I like to keep it real with my readers and give it to you straight no chaser. I know that set backs and things happen. I also know that it’s not the end of the world and I will be able to finish, but right now, in this moment, I feel like someone has taken my air supply for me to breathe. Due to financial reasons, I am unable to finish school at the moment. I know that many have been where I am, and even more have experienced this same situation, but this is my current reality. The reality that I feel like I’ve failed. Parents raise their children to follow the directions, law and get a good education. I have done all of that and yet it seems like it was for nothing. Being a PhD student has taught me a lot about myself and to endure patience in the inevitable. Even though I only have 3 classes until I start writing my dissertation, I guess patience is something I still have to endure before I am able to go back to school. Ah, the irony!

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Not working in a field or job that is tolerable is the worst kind of agony that I don’t wish on anymore. At first it’s like, ” Okay, I’m going to be fine. I have a savings that will hold me for a while.” Then it turns to, ” Holy shit! I’m out of money, what am I going to do?” The unthinkable of not wanting to feel even more like a failure or lame you turn to those parents who taught you how to make it on your own and tell them not only have you failed, but school is deferred. It’s something like a hard blow to the head on the way down to the floor. Now, I’ve never been hit in the head, but I can imagine the pain that comes with it. I know some of you may be thinking, ” It’s not the end of the world, you will go back when you get the funds.” I hope that does happen. Its just an initial shock. I’m still struggling to find work and I’m no longer in school. I have to take a leave of absence for a while just until things change.

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This is currently how I’m feeling. Determine what the next step is for my life, if there is a next step to take. Im doing all I can by applying for jobs everywhere on a daily basis. My dream of successful writer is still in the works because I am writing or at least I will be. I opened up a manuscript that I had started and read it. It’s a love story and yet I just keep staring at the chapter 3 mark. We will not even go there in the relationship department. Granted, I want to be happy and have a successful relationship that will lead to marriage, but right now I don’t know if I’m coming or going. I just keep asking myself, ” Why do good people get the shittiest hands in life?” I understand the concept of life happening and things are never perfect, but it’s like every time you turn around it’s always something. Well, I think I’m done turning. What can happen if I stand still? Oh yea, nothing, lol. At least if I’m turning, I’m moving, right? Prayer has been my best friend and my journal has been my right hand. In due time I will have a good job and school will resume. The dream is not put off, it’s just a dream deferred.

Fear Can Kick Rocks!


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Hey Readers! Before I go into detail about my post, I first want to thank EVERYONE for their kind words about my post regarding Goal Setting. So, I just finished reading a school assignment that I was way behind on and it has my brain fried. But, since I have writing a daily blog on my newly t0-do list on my phone, I figure I would kill two birds with one stone and write something fun and get the task done.  I was thinking about the term fear and what it meant to me. I decided that my own definition is:

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Fear-Being afraid to allow those of importance see your gifts and awesomeness!

I posted a picture of the late Robin Williams because he explains in an interview about how he was afraid to be funny. He had stated that no one understand why he wanted to be an actor and a comedian. Well, I am glad that he was able to put that fear aside because what we have here is a LEGEND, and a funny one. Robin was able to find his niche and actually go for it. Was he fearful? It is possible that he was, but I have learned that fear and nervousness are two different things.

Confidence

Being afraid to try new things or learn something new can hold you back a ton! I will use myself as an example. I can say that I despise statistics with a passion. I always have felt that I would do it wrong and fail a class. Now, years later, I still have to take some or statistics course and instead of  being afraid, I change my mindset. This is how I chose to tackle that fear.

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  1. I said that I was going to do my best and pass the class. You’d be surprised how positive pep talks are to yourself. It not only relieves the anxiety, but it makes you believe in yourself. ( At least it does for me)
  2. Before the class started, I was honest with my instructor about my lack of statistics and math skills. This actually helped me a lot because she was able to give me some videos to watch and practices to do before class.
  3. Make friends with those in class. 9 times out of 10, if you are unsure of the material, someone else is as well. Two heads are better than one.
  4. Actually try. Okay, I know this may sound redundant, but you would be surprised at how many students(myself included) would do the minimum to skate by the class or glide along with little knowledge of the material. Now, with this, you can think of it two way, you can’t get by with paying minimum of a bill and think you will skate by, so you mind as well learn all you can to actually pass. Or in my example, pay the entire bill.
  5. By putting fear aside and trying, I actually ended up liking the class and what I was learning. I got a C in that statistics class, but I was 2 points from a B and I tried my hardest instead of being fearful.

Growth-v-FixedI know I used this in previous blog, but it goes along with fear. In order to tell fear kick rocks, you have to change your mindset. My friend once said, ” Flowing water never goes stagnant.” Do not be comfortable with fear because time will pass and you will still be in the same place, comfortable and complacent. Tell fear to kick rocks and you keep it moving. Be the best you that you can be and focus on what matters.

Here is a good book, that will help you tell fear to kick rocks. I highly recommend this book and I have a review of it as well. It is a MUST read if you want to ” get your life” as they say!

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Your Mindset: Is It Fixed or Growth?


Happy Wednesday!

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Happy hump day! I hope all is well on this beautiful Wednesday and you are all enjoying the second day of summer! I wanted to blog today about having a growth or fixed mindset. As I am still plugging away with reading the nook by Carol S. Dweck, Ph.D it is making me think more about my mindset and I need to change that no matter what.

Mindset

This book is truly something special. You maybe asking if you do not already know, what is a growth or fixed mindset? In my opinion I see this has having a positive or negative attitude about yourself and/or a situation. This can even be in relationships. I am learning that the way you think can be a powerful thing.

Growth-v-Fixed

In my case I share the traits of both a fixed and growth mindset. Lately, I have been thinking a lot about my life and the people I have in it. Listening to what they say and how they respond to things and most of them have a fixed mindset. I am not really trying to surround myself with those kind of people. I am developing a growth mindset. I usually equate the fixed mindset when it comes to feelings of failure. If I didn’t make it, I won’t make it. Please don’t do this. My current job has ended and I am trying to be in a good place about it. My time ended and I know that something better is coming. If I get another rejection letter, I have to say, better is coming. I will be okay. This is what developing a growth mindset is about.

Mindset With Relationships

Me and Illy

I don’t know about other relationships, so I will use mine as an example. This is me and my current boyfriend. Here we are, we look happy right, content even. Our thoughts and goals are totally different. He thinks for now and somewhat for the future. He’s money conscious which is important. I would say that he has traits of both fixed and growth mindset. On the flip side, patience is a hard at times. I know I have had times where I was impatient and wanted what I wanted at that moment. I have learned to plan things out instead of just jumping head first as I used to. As whole for me and my boyfriend, I do not know if we are a ” forever” couple. Sure we have some of the same long term goals, but we are still very different. I’d like it be forever, but that is too early to determine. We are in a good space. Our dreams are very different so I am excited to see what will become of us as we continue dating.

Let me know in the comments are do you have a growth or fixed mindset?

 

 

 

Is It Imperative To Reward Yourself?


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Hey readers!

As I packing up my desk today for my last day in the office ( I will still help out from time to time), it made me feel so bittersweet. I had my bag and putting my office dishes ( mugs, etc) and I couldn’t help but to take a deep sigh. On the verge of tears, I held it tougher because I couldn’t believe that the 10 month program had gone by so fast. I was happy but I also had a panic feeling. What’s next? What do I do now? I spoke to my boss who was watching me pack up and she was complimenting me on what a great job I did working for her, but then she said something that really made me think. She said, ” Krystol, although I do hope you find another job you will not be happy until you are making money doing something creative. Make something your own and make money from it.” I was at a loss for words. Here I am applying for jobs day in and day out knowing that I would not truly be happy. Since I’ve been blogging more, I notice that I am able to get out more content when I write what I want. Then she said, ” When the time comes you will figure out what you want to do and you will be happy, but in the meantime don’t forget to reward yourself. Reward myself? I thought quietly.  I had heard another boss tell me to do that too. But, honestly, how do you do that? Spa trip, vacation? New books? Well, the new books part sounds fun!

This may sound silly, but I started to look up ways to reward myself for finishing what was a hectic program. AmeriCorps is no joke. Working 1700 hours, plus trainings on Friday that can be daunting at times, workshops that you present and retreats where you ” bond” with others in the program. It was an experience. Would I do it again? No.  I say this only because I felt this program is something for those between the ages of 18-25. It was not for me, but I did learn a lot about myself and a few extra pointers along the way. So, it was not in vain if that makes sense. To reward myself, I am going to treat myself to a $40 book spree.

What does this mean?

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Well, I will buy all of the books that I want for $50 bucks! I think I am going to order on book outlet and have a party. They always have the best books for cheap. That and thrift books.Com! I LOVE that site. Did I mention that all of the books are VERY cheap, too? I may just do thrift books because once you order $10 worth of books, shipping is free.  I know I said I was on a ban until I read half of what was on my shelf, but it does not hurt to splurge a little, right? After all it is MY reward! I think I will get every book that Colleen Hoover and Libba Bray has written. See…I’m going over budget already! Any who, it has been said to me to always reward yourself when you complete a task. I think that if the reward is not beneficial to you, then the task is irrelevant.

Let me know in the comments, is it imperative to reward yourself?

Is It Wise To Dream Big?


Happy Monday!

Monday Blahs

Hey Readers! So, I was sitting here evaluating and thinking about life. I was thinking about my goals and things that I wanted to do with my life. We are often taught to set a goal and stick with it. Make sure that the goal is obtainable and we can try to reach it. Well, I have many goals. In fact, I think that I have too many goals that I try to reach at the same time. But, then I just realized that there is nothing wrong with having a lot of goals, but to do one thing at a time.  It’s funny, my writing mentor and many other people have told me that I try to do too much too fast. Lastly, I have to agree with them. With school, trying to find another job and attempt to write again, the world is in my face. Not in a sense that people are in my face, but that I have so many opportunities that I can grab. Then again, my focus is every where except for one place.

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I had once read a book called, ” The Magic of Thinking Big” by Dr. John Swartz. This book really helped me with coming to terms that I have to make things happen in order to see success. Then it dawned on me I needed to get myself together. I had to start believing in my gifts and really utilize them. One thing that  I used to always do was tell people my ideas and my dreams. Some would think it was wise while others would say, ” Krystol, there is no way that you can do that or yea you and everyone else wish they could be that successful.” After talking to myself for what seemed liked hours, I decided to stop confiding in others about my life and my dreams. After all, it is all about me, right? Not in an egoistical kind of way, but just, about me in a sense that this is my world, my fate that I decide if things happen. Granted, I know that God works in mysterious ways, but faith without works is dead! People or those who were once like me, I have a message for you: Get off your lazy ass and get your shit together! So what someone tells you no, find someone who will say YES. Or better yet, create YES for yourself.

To Dream Big or Not Dream Big? That Is The Question

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I say go for it. If people are not riding with you on that train, then kick them off. I have come to the realization that I need to kick people off. Start worrying about yourself and not  everyone else. This goes for co-workers, friends, family, and even foes. It’s funny how people on social media are so quick to blast their lives and things that they think are good. I can’t be like the rest. I have to be different. Different stands out and I want to stand out in a way that I am able to make it for myself. My mindset is that I am the acceptation to the rule. For those that actually really my blog posts this is for you. Never let anyone tell you that you cannot do what you want to do in life. Always have people in your corner who believe and want the best for you. Start saying no to leeches, users, fakes and phonies. If you have a dream(s) see it through. I recently read a writer’s blog I forget her name, but she wanted to live in Ireland. She had written a book that had Irish word usage, the town, etc. She had written the book about ten years ago and once she decided that she wanted to live in Ireland, she started to get prepared. In order to do so she started to save money  and became very frugal. It took her eighteen years, but she is now a homeowner to a cottage in Ireland and has moved there from Philadelphia. She had a dream and she went for it. Sure, there were obstacles along the way, but she never gave up on what she wanted to do. Her story really inspired me. I want to be a successful in all areas be it novels, films, and TV. My other goal is to be a researcher in educational psychology. It just dawned on me that I am really good with research. Quantitative research is not my favorite, I’d very much prefer Qualitative research, but hey, beggars can’t be choosers right? Today, I have taken an oath to do what is important to me and be selfish. I say no when I usually say yes and I have started to save money again. I maybe moving soon ( don’t know where) once I find a job so I have to be prepared. To answer my own question, Is it wise to dream big? Hell Yes! Go for it, reach for the stars!

Life Coach?


Happy Tuesday!

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Hey readers! I hope everyone is having a great evening at home. Are you curled up with a good book? Anyway, I was in the mood to write so I figured why not blog. Lately, there has been a lot going on with trying to find a job and still trying to write or lack their of. My mentor always told me that when I did not feel like writing not to write. But, I did not think that this funk or block would last for 3 months!! Good lord, but yet, I still have another day to get on the band wagon.  So, I noticed that a lot of time has been focused on social media. It is the worst thing to do when you are procrastinating and could be doing other productive things like….Writing!

mind map for setting personal life goals

Often times I reflect on my life and myself and there is always something that could be changed or I could be doing better. Like…time management. Sure, I’m a ph.d student and I am currently working until the end of the month and these last three months have been like ugh lol. Not necessarily in a bad way, but I have been a little stressed with trying to find my next job.  I decided to get a life coach! It’s so funny, I met Tara when I did Airbnb which is a private bed n breakfast. It was my first time using any bed and breakfast so it was really cool. When I met her and asked what she did for a living, she told me that she was a life coach! Now, I had heard of life coaches before and know a couple,  but I did not know all of what it did entail. Needless to say, our session was amazing! I felt a little relieved and emotional after our conversation. What made me even think about getting a life coach was that I felt I needed help sorting out my life. Trying to find a job and still write, being a doctoral student and even having a new relationship. I need to balance everything so that I won’t feel so all over the place to the point where I shut down. Lately, I have been doing a lot of praying and just thinking over things within the past year. I am proud of what I have accomplished thus far, but now I am moving on and I want to be the happiest me that I can be. Have you ever felt that way? To those who have a life coach and don’t mind sharing your experience, please let me know in the comments,how has this helped you in your life?

 

 

Opening Up When Opportunity Knocks…


Good evening

Good evening readers!

I hope that everyone has had a great week this week and you are having an even better weekend! Things have been busy with work and school, but I am determined to make my blog a part of my writing routine as I do with journals. Life tends to happen and go in a fast pace. So, what’s new with you? How’s the reading going? Writers, are you writing?

On the writing front, I have started a new novel, but I have been busy to continue writing. Well, I won’t say busy, I will be honest and say it is not on the high list of priorities at the moment. These past two weeks, I have been taking two classes in school, plus working full-time as I have always been. I need to work on my time management skills as I always say. Hey, it’s youtube’s fault! That site is addicting beyond measure and between watching videos about books, reading and writing, I have neglected my first love. I am a work in progress.

But, I wanted to talk or write to my followers about an opportunity.  When you have a dream or a goal and it starts to manifest, do you take the offer or decline out of fear? I used to decline because I felt I was not ready or was very afraid.  As I mentioned before, my current position ends in June. I have applied for other jobs and today I had a job interview for a position that is 2 and half hours from where I am. I will have to relocate with makes me nervous all over again! What brings the anxiety is the fact that I have to learn a new area. But, I will be okay.  The job is a great one though, definately a steeping stone in the right direction of my field. It’s a researcher/writing assistant position. This is going to be fun! It’s for a non-profit organization so being as though my major is PhD in Educational Psychology, i will be able to utilize my research skills. It’s not the dream job, persay, but my dream job is to write and do research, but within a different entity. So, I think that this will be cool. If offered the position which I think I will be, I will gladly accept! Although I will be nervous, it will be good for me because I am doing what I love! When an opportunity comes your way, do you take it? Let me know in the comments!

How to not be hard on yourself

 

Are You Ruining Your Own Success?


Tuesday

Good morning, readers! It is Tuesday and I hope the rest of your day goes well. I have to start reading some articles for school, but as I was reading blogs, I came across this post here and I loved it! It really made me think about success and how I may have been holding myself back due to negative mindset and people.  Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying that all people are negative, but those can be negative without even noticing it.

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Are you ruining your own success? 

We always tend to ask for approval from others in may ways. For example, if you and your friend are going shopping and you ask her, ” Do I look in this?” In your mind you already feel that you are, but because she says no, you don’t buy it. Why? Why do we tend to value others opinion more than our own?  Now that I think about it, it sounds so STUPID that I have given other people power over my judgement of how I view myself, my life etc.  As you guys already know, I am in school for my PhD. Since I have started this journey and other ones that are deemed successful by others, I am often judged. I am not judged in public, but quietly. I am sure there are people who are jealous, wish they could achieve the same, etc. If you are one of those people YOU CAN do whatever it is that you put your mind you.  What must you do to get it done? Here are 10 things that you will you be more positive and make better choices. This things may be hard to do, but I think it is needed in order to get into the mindset of being successful.

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1. Stop the excuses.  We have so many of these when it comes to doing the things we want to do. Some excuses are, there is no time, I have kids, I work and go to school, I have no support. FUCK ALL OF THAT!!  That is bullshit! I have even used some of these excuses. If you want to do anything, you will make time for it. Kids should be the reason to do anything to better yourself, not be your downfall or crutch.

2. Change your mindset. This is an oldie but goodie. I had to check myself today. The mind is such a powerful tool. Anytime, it can make you happy, sad, depressed, etc. This asset is serious. Think more positive and less negative. I told myself that I will have to be more positive. Faith without works is dead.

3. Surround yourself with successful people.  Okay let me explain this one in more detail. I do not mean to hang with people who are rich. Granted, if you do, you can learn about money in greater detail. However, my point is to surround yourself with those who are about something positive in life. Do not let those who have a negative mindset and NO drive to succeed, crowd your judgement or you. Trust me, I have even cut family off, and I could care less. I know it may sound harsh, but if one is not about something positive and always has something to say, I don’t need you in my life. I love you, but I do not have to like you.

4. Work Hard. No matter what it is that you want to be successful with, always work hard. I know this is something that you maybe saying, ” duh Krystol”, but it makes a difference. Giving your all into your passion makes others notice. If they see you are serious they may want to help.

5.  Have Fun.  It does not matter how hard your work, who you hang with, etc if you don’t have fun time for yourself. Working hard is cool, but give yourself a break here and there. It is good for the soul. Well, at least that is what my grandmother used to say. I need to follow my own advice. I am always fiddling on my computer and ordering take out lol. I will get it tougher. My goal is to go to Book Con next year and other book events. Plus write two books this year.

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And always plan to win! In the comments below, what do you want to successful in?