My Week In A Nutshell


Hey Readers!

Happy Saturday, to you! Boy, this week has been something else! I mean it was eventful, but stressful as well. I started a new job and although I’m grateful, I started to feel like I was taking steps backwards. Don’t get me wrong the pay is amazing, but the content of the position is like ugh. Working in a call center at a bank is daunting, but rewarding. I know you maybe thinking, ” Krystol, what are you talking about?” Let me vent and express my feelings. We all know that writing is my passion and life. It’s what I want to do, so taking a job to work in yet another call center is where I feel like I’m backwards. But, I am praying that I change my mindset for Monday. It’s the first day we get on the phones and my anxiety is through the roof. Now, I know you maybe thinking again, ” Krystol, this isn’t your first call center job.” I know, but the system is new and it seems like I’m solving a jigsaw puzzle.

But, did I also mention that this job isn’t the DREAM job. Granted, I am sure everyone feels that way working there, but ugh! We gotta start somewhere, right? Of course, I consulted and sulked to my mom who said, ” Never stop applying for the dream job, but be grateful for the one you have.” It’s easier said than done. I mean, this week I had a great first day, then it kind of went down hill. I don’t fit in with the other workers ( not that I have to) and all of a sudden the thought of being on the phones is annoying to me, lol. I feel like I didn’t go to school and get all of these degrees to work in a call center and talk on the phone all day.

New Idea, Need YOUR advice

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I’ve had this idea for a while of starting my own column. I want to call it, ” Krystol Speaks” where people ask me advice on writing, their situations, and more. When I used yo write for a magazine, I pitched it to the CEO and she didn’t like it. So, they say, ” When you want something done, you have to do it yourself.” I want to do just that. What do you guys think? Would you read it or care to ask my advice? My goal is to get a domain name for this blog and write on Krystol Speaks about three times a week. Hopefully, I can create a job by sharing it with future employers like NewYork Times or even Huffington Post, or anywhere. Then goal is to write for a living. If you think I should go with it, thanks for your support. If not, that’s okay, I will still do it anyway, lol.

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Setting Priorities When It Comes To Your Dreams


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Happy Sunday, Readers!

Sunday

There comes a time in your life when you must say enough is enough. My grandmother used to always say, ” Eventually you will get tired.” She said that for a lot of things and I never knew what she meant. It seemed like that statement went with every reference of life from being unhappy, not liking to do certain tasks, etc. As I was driving today thinking about another motivational video I watched, it hit me. My grandmother meant that eventually I would be tired of not being my happiest or truest self whether it involves other people or not. It got me thinking about my topics as of like dreams, success and being your best self.  I have decided that I am tired of living for others. For example,  some people think you should live your life in a way is THEIR norm. Work a normal job, get paid a normal paycheck and live a normal life. But, makes your normal different from someone else’s? Your normal is probably totally different from mine. Some people are content and happy working with a company for 30+ years, owning their home and retiring. This is one way that society has taught us to live. But, for me, what’s normal to society isn’t for me. I get bored easily ( hence the many jobs I’ve had), but I feel like this I won’t know what I like or don’t like if I don’t explore and try new things.

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I’ve come to the conclusion where I am tired of society’s opinion for my life through other people. I’ve said all week that I want to be a writer. I’m talented in it, it’s something I would do for free and still be happy with it. I enjoy writing in many different genres ,which not only keeps me out of a bubble, but I’m versatile as well. I learn to write in different areas so I can adapt to change as it comes with writing. When it comes to my life, I have to check myself and get MY priorities in order. The thoughts and opinions of other people no longer matter. I no longer seek advice from others who don’t have my same aspirations at heart. Why? They have no clue the drive and determination I have to really make it. You can have some of the best people in your life that you love and love you to an extent become your biggest downfall. We as people seek validation ( why I have no clue), but we do and we want others to tell us what’s right or wrong, or what would or wouldn’t they do. Fuck that shit! I can’t ask questions like that anymore because they aren’t me and I am not them. Our mindsets are totally different. My mother just told me today, ” If you listen to what people say, you will never go anywhere or do anything.” That advice was paramount because it was so on time for where I’m headed in life and where I am now on my new journey to being my best self and living my dreams. I know you must be asking, just what are these alleged priorities?

  1. Keep God First
  2. Take every job position as a learning experience, which will prepare me for my writing job
  3. Continue to study the craft of writing and READ as many books, articles, and blogs as I can
  4. Continue applying for ALL writing jobs until the perfect one happens.
  5. Remain Humble. I have to carry the crown before I wear it by paying my dues and starting from the bottom if I have to.
  6. Write everyday no matter what.
  7. Become 2 Corinthians 13

To Thine Own Self Be True 

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Following Your Dreams: Nature or Nurture?


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Lately, I have been watching a lot of Ted Talks and YouTube videos on how one finds their purpose and lives their fullest life. We are told at an early age in life that you can be whatever you want to be. In some ways I think this is true, but what happens when fear gets in the way of your dream. If you are like me there has been SEVERAL times where I had a lot of dreams or goals that I wanted to accomplish. I started to write when I was about 13 years old. First it was poetry, then I essay and I soon graduated to short stories and full on novels. It was a talent that I realized I had. I was someone who could tell amazing stories through words. Pretty fascinating stuff, right? When I turned 18, my dream was to be a nurse. I wanted to help people heal and get better. My mother went to school for nursing and I was inspired by her drive. It was short-lived because addiction became her focus. Then, I realized nursing wasn’t the way to go. Don’t get me wrong, I tried, I went to community college and took an anatomy and physiology class. It scared the crap out of me to learn that I had to memorize every bone in the body. That’s a lot of bones. I panicked and asked my mom for help. Not only did she know all of the bones, but she knew what bone helped what. Clearly, that was her dream and not mine. Then, later on I wanted to be a shrink. I was always told that I give great advice and that I was a trust worthy person. My mind was focused and I was a great listener. One of my professor’s  Ms. Brisel taught psychology 101 in a way that I had become fascinated and knew I was getting into the right field. So, what did I do? I got a bachelor’s degree in Behavioral Science. Guess, what? Til this day I STILL don’t use it. I tried to find a job in that field, without experience, no one will give me a shot.

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Now, I’m about 23 years old and I feel like the biggest failure known to man. I went to college, got the degree and couldn’t find a job in the field. My mind was starting to play tricks on me telling me I’m stupid and that I wasted money on a useless degree. I believed it. So, I did what any other person would do who was trying to find their way, I went back to school. First, I majored in Master’s in Social Work. I’m like yes, I am going to be a counselor! This is my time to shine and help people. Within the middle of the first semester, I put on academic probation and was flunking out. I had never told anyone that, until now. My life as I knew was in shambles. I had been a professional student for so long that I wasn’t able to find a secure job. Oh, did I mention I had just moved to North Carolina on a wing and a prayer? I had about eight thousand dollars saved and me and my friend just left. I wasn’t getting a job in Delaware so I figured I’d try my shot somewhere else. Somewhere where I wasn’t reminded of my failures within myself, my family, the friends I thought I had, the men that disappointed in life. I needed out. When the advisor told me I was flunking out of graduate school, I didn’t want to quit. I mean, I didn’t want to keep that major, but I didn’t want to quit. There I was sitting in my new 2 bedroom town house with no furniture or food, just electric, I started to write a new book, which was my third book. I did some research on new schools and found FullSail University. It was a film school that was located in Florida and I could go online. The options for majors were very long and then it found me. What was a release for me majority of my life was sitting there, it was creative writing.  I could get my MFA in Creative Writing. It was still my Master’s degree and I was still in school! Woo hoo! The phone meeting with an enrollment counselor went great. The program was for a year and I would be finished. The following year I had my Master’s in Creative Writing. Due to money issues, I was unable to go to the graduation, but I still passed. I learned to write everything, films, games, TV Pilot, Animation. I graduated with a 3.5.

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Although I got my Master’s I still wasn’t able to find a job in the field. It seemed I had to relocate to California or New York in order to write. My advisor told I didn’t have to move, but yet, I still wasn’t finding THE job I wanted. I wanted to write for a company or network. But, in all honesty, I wasn’t able to find my niche. It’s that way still. I’m so versatile in my writing that I can’t stick to one genre. But, then again, why should I? I’ve dabbled in journalism, magazines, blogs and even proposals.

Now, it’s 2018 and I’m still not writing  for a company or network. I’m still trying to find my niche. But, in between that I’ve written several books and ghost wrote a few as well. I have written many screenplays, treatments for shows and TV Pilots. It’s all in what I call (the vault), saved on my computer and USB drive. I won’t give up. My dream is to work as a writer of some sort and I will do just that. Monday I start a new job working as a customer solutions specialist. I’m going to be the best employee that I can be until it’s time to work that dream job.

Dreams

As I was thinking about my topic for today I thought about something DeVon Franklin said his book that I’m reading, ” The Hollywood Commandments A Spiritual Guide To Secular Success.” He said, ” You have to be able to carry the crown, before you can wear one.” It resonated with me because he talked about who he wanted to work in entertainment and every job that he had before he got his dream job and eventually starting his own company, prepared him to be where he is now in his life.  I believe this job I’m starting on Monday will do the same as well. Now, even though I am starting a different job, I still applied for writing jobs everywhere. I am thankful for my new job and I will serve there to the best of my ability. Who knows, I may even get to be a technical writer at my company, if something else doesn’t come along. DeVon states, ” you have to realize that you must start at the bottom in order to make it to the top. ” Or one must pay their dues. Another mentor that I’m following is Evan Michael and Laura Berman Fortgang. Evan said, ” Explore your options and find out what your purpose isn’t or what you like doing. It can only happen with experience.” He talked about trying snow boarding, salsa dancing and really enjoyed it. He said you won’t know what you don’t like to do if you don’t try it. It’s okay to explore because your purpose will find you. The bible says, ” Your gift will make room for you.” I wholeheartedly believe that. Laura said, ” A lot of people have a lot of ambition based on what they don’t want to be in their life i. e  their parents, a statistic.”  Career satisfaction doesn’t come from what you do, it comes from who you get to be while doing it. The beauty is who you get to be is the real you.”  The more I read these books by DeVon Franklin and watch videos like Evan Carmichael and Laura Fortgang, I realize that I am where I am supposed to be right now and I will be a writer because it is what I want to do. Dreams are what you make them to be. Some are born with them knowing what they want to do and some are learned by life’s experience. Is your dream nature or nurture?

Dream-Big

Want A Paid Writing Gig?


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My fellow writers! I have a GEM for you! I know how we writers want to make a living writing or at least be appreciated for what we have to bring to the table, right? I came across this online paid magazine by networking right here on wordpress. I started to read other’s blogs and BOOM there it was! Yes, I am talking about this banner right here:

This is totally legit! I even signed a contract and met other writers for the magazine as well. This is a new magazine and I must say that I very excited to accept the position of a columnist! My areas of expertise will be for Bookish News and Reviews, Writer’s Life and Fashion & Beauty sections. I could not be more proud to be a part of a great magazine. If you have more questions please do hesitate to email the editor at EDITOR@CONSCIOUSTALKMAG.COM.

My Thoughts:

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If you look back on my  What’s On Your Writer’s Bucket List?  back in 2013, I stated that I wanted to write for a company. I did not specify what type of company because it could be anything. I have been a contributing writer for a few magazines, but never having my own column(s). This opportunity is so exciting for me. You have no idea. I want all of my writer friends to join in on this venture with me if you are interested and have the time.

Procrastination


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Happy Monday! I know please do not sound so grim. It will not be that bad today. We are all going to have a good day, right? Right! I wanted to touch on procrastination. We all do it and as we do it, we wish that it was not a thing. For any writer it is hard to keep on track sometimes. We may have something going on in our lives where writing seems impossible. I have been there and I know that life happens.

How do we not procrastinate? Well, I have a couple of things that have helped me. Sometimes we have to do things that are out of our norm or things we would usually do. There will be trial and error, but figuring out what works for you.

  • Keeping A Schedule  – This can work many ways. You can keep a calendar and put different things that you write on different days. For example, on Monday, write a blog, Tuesday, write three chapters of a novel, on Wednesday work on journaling. Having a calendar can be beneficial. But, if you are like me, this does not work. It will work for a few days and then that is it.
  • Writing Daily  –  It’s a little similar to keep a schedule, but not really. Writing daily can be for the same project. If you are writing a novel or a screenplay, you may write every day until the project is finished. This can be more of a habit because on the days you do not write, you will feel weird when you have not written anything.
  • Writing Partner  – I have had many writing partners or buddies through out of writing career. They are there to hold you accountable with your writing. Your partner may suggest sprints or even put you on a writing schedule to make sure that you are keeping busy. I have an accountability partner, her name is Jennifer. She is a great friend. We met in a writing group on Facebook and have been rocking out together since. I have read her work and vice versa.
  • Writing Prompts  – I know we have those days when we are not really into our projects. It is okay. We are human and have those days at times. What works best for me is to still write by utilizing a writing prompt. Sometimes I will blog it or write in my writing journal.

These are just a few things that you can do to not procrastinate. Will you follow these examples and never procrastinate again? Of course not. I will not even follow these all the time, but it is nice to do when you are feeling like you are in a writing slump. Let’s talk in the comments, what do you do to not procrastinate?

Having A Good Writing Flow


Happy Monday

Happy Monday!

I know this day is gruesome for some, but try to keep an open mind. For those writers who are doing Camp NanoWriMo, how is it going? As for me, I just hit a little over 27k and I am loving the progress of this story. It is really coming along nicely. My total word count goal is 70k so please keep my fingers and mind in your prayers.

It is imperative to have a good writing flow once you are finish with your outline. This can be creating an awesome schedule, writing with a writing buddy or participating in sprints. Sprints are when you write for a certain amount of time by yourself or with others. They are really fun. At times the flow of writing can be so good that you forget to eat meals or even do other things that were on your to-do list. Yesterday, I started to write in the afternoon and I did that for 2 hours then took a break. Then I started back up at about 9pm until 11 and I wrote 4000 words! I surpassed my goal by more than half. I was so proud of myself.

Having a good writing flow is important, but allow yourself some time to take a break. The last thing that you want to do is suffer from burnout. Burnout to writing is like unemployment to workers. It does not mix at all. There are some people that are mood writers and like to write when they feel lead to. I used to be like that, but since I want to write for a living like Stephen King, I have to  write and read daily. Reading is just as important when you are taking a break from your writing flow. It keeps you fresh and innovative in my opinion. Whether you are writing every day or sporadically, enjoy the writing flow and let it take your story to another level.

Can You Be Your Own Support System?


Happy Thursday!

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We go through many things in our life where we need and desire support from others. But, when we are able to gain that support from our friends and loved ones, are we able to seek it in ourselves? Yes! It is called determination and motivation. Now, with my writing career, I am sure that there are MANY people who disapprove of my career path. In turn that is okay, but when you have people like that, it is time to rid of toxic waste.  In my opinion being a writer is a lonely world until your readers support your work. In my time as a writer, I have seen some great reviews and even some bad ones. I took a step back and re-assessed the bad reviews. I take into consideration what the readers have to say. My work may look great in my eyes, but the readers are the real judges.

Dream-Big

With that being said, I motivate myself often to make the next book or writing endeavor better than the last one. I wanted to make sure that my words were relatable and valid for anyone who even cracked a page or clicked to see my work. My motivation and determination for myself has to be strong because everyone does not see my dream the way that I do. Sure, you will get discouraged when rejection happens, but use that rejection for fuel to continue to work on your craft and be the best writer that you can be. One of my goals this year was to keep my blog updated and relevant. There were times where I did not wrote for months and I saw the change in that versus now to me writing on a daily basis. I appreciate your support with my blog.  You liking my blog posts makes me feel good about the posts that I will continue to have.  A year ago, I did a vision board with my previous position and I look at it every day now just to motivate and remind myself that I am destined for greatness. Now, I feel like I have to keep my work to myself in a way and not tell everyone my dreams because I will not get the support that I give myself.

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I do have a journal with goals in it. I never look at it. In my mind, I know what I achieve to do. Every time I achieve a new thing, I go back to my goals journal and see how close or far I came to achieving them. Thus far, I am on track because I am motivating myself. Currently, I am motivated and determined to finish this novel for NanoWriMo way before the end of the July. I really believe that this book is going to put me on the map. Never allow anyone to tell you that you can not or deter you from your dreams.

Are You Optimistic Enough?


Happy Monday! Let’s Be Optimistic and Make It Great!

I Can Do It

But, can we really, you know, do it? Life can get us down, but it is up to us, to keep it together. Now, I am living witness of not being optimistic the last few months. It brings me to shame to, because I’m a Sagittarius and being optimistic is one our main traits. I used to be very optimistic until life started to show me that everything that glittered was not gold. I mean, I wanted it to be gold, well, I would rather that it was. But, let’s face it, the world does not work our way, which leads me to being more optimistic about life.

We often focus on the things that happen and are not working in our lives that we forget how blessed we truly are. Not to get all religious on you, but the bible says, ” When you are grateful for little, he will bless you with more.” This has been my new approach of late, being happy where I am. I have a roof over my head and food in my mouth. Things will get better in time.

Being More Optimistic

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The term optimistic means, ” hopeful and feeling confident for the future”.  Understand that you are not your circumstances or your struggle.  This also has to do with our mindset as well. Check out my post about having a positive mindset. Here are some ways that you can work on your optimism. I got some help from Wiki on how to be optimistic.
1. Recognize the good and bad in your life and examine how you’ve been affected by each. Optimism doesn’t mean you have to feel “happy” all the time. In fact, trying to force feelings of happiness during potentially traumatic experiences can be unhealthy.  Instead, attune yourself to the full range of emotions in your life, accepting that the negative as well as positive feelings are a natural part of human experience. Trying to repress a certain type of emotion can cause severe emotional distress. Not focusing more on one type of emotion than the other can actually help you become more adaptive and proactive in future unexpected situations. This will increase your ability to be optimistic and resilient in the face of uncertainty.
Negative feelings can become a conditioned habit over time. Avoid blaming yourself for negative emotions and associations. Blame is unhelpful because it doesn’t look forward to how you can grow; it looks backward at what has already happened.
Instead, focus on being mindful of when these negative emotions occur. A journal could help you do this. Write down when you experience negative feelings or thoughts, then examine their contexts and explore alternative ways of responding to them.
For example, imagine that someone cuts you off in traffic. You respond by feeling angry, honking your horn, and perhaps yelling at the driver even though s/he can’t hear you. You could write in your journal what happened, how it made you feel, and what your immediate response was. Don’t judge yourself as “right” or “wrong,” just write down what happened.
Next, take a step back and think about what you’ve written. Was your response in accordance with your values and the type of person you want to be? If not, what could you have done differently? What do you think you were really responding to? For example, perhaps you weren’t really angry at the driver; maybe you had a stressful day and allowed your stress to explode on that one person.
Look forward when you write these entries. Don’t use them just as a place to wallow in negative feelings. Think about what you can learn from the experience. What can you use to grow as a person? Can you use this experience to inform other experiences? If you encounter a similar situation next time, how might you respond in a way that is in line with your values? For example, perhaps realizing that you responded with anger because of your stressful day could help you realize that everyone makes mistakes and encourage you to feel more empathetic with other people the next time someone shows anger toward you. Having a pre-existing idea of how you want to respond to negative situations can also help you in the tough moments.

2. Practice mindfulness. Mindfulness is a key component of optimism because it encourages you to focus on acknowledging your emotions in the moment without judging them. Often, negative reactions arise when we try to struggle against our feelings, or when we allow ourselves to become so blinded by our emotions that we forget that we can control how we respond to them.  Focusing on your breathing, accepting your body and your feelings, and learning from your emotions rather than denying them can help you become comfortable with yourself, which is important when those negative emotions arise.
Mindfulness meditation has been shown by many studies to help with feelings of anxiety and depression. It can actually reprogram the way your body responds to stress.
Look for mindfulness meditation classes in your community. You can also find guided meditations online, such as at the UCLA Mindful Awareness Research Center[16] or BuddhaNet  (And of course, there are several great tutorials on Wikihow.)
You don’t have to commit a huge amount of time to meditation to see its effects. Just a few minutes a day can help you become more aware and accepting of your emotions.[18]

3. Identify whether your inner monologue is an optimist or a pessimist. Our inner monologue is a great indicator of whether we naturally take a positive or negative outlook on life. Pay attention to your inner monologue over the course of a day and see if any of the following forms of negative self-talk (that is, your inner monologue) are appearing regularly:
Magnifying the negative aspects of a situation and filtering out all of the positive ones.
Automatically blaming yourself for any negative situation or event.
Anticipating the worst in any given situation. The drive-through coffee shop gets your order wrong and you automatically think that the rest of your day will be a disaster.
You see things only as good or bad (also known as polarization). In your eyes, there is no middle ground.

4. Look for the positives in your life. It’s important to re-orient your inner monologue to focus on the positive aspects of both you as an individual and the world around you. Although positive thinking is only one of the steps towards becoming a true optimist, the effects of positive thinking for both your body and mind can be significant, such as:
Increased life span
Lower rates of depression
Lower levels of distress
Improved immune system
Better psychological and physical well-being
Reduced risk of death from cardiovascular disease
Better coping skills during hardships and times of stress

Some of these situations I witness first hand, especially depression. But, now I have a renewed mindset and better control of knowing I can’t worry about things out of my control. Daily, it is good to speak positive affirmations and surround yourself with positive people. I hope that these tips have helped you a lot as it has for me.

Jobs For Writers


Writers block

Being a writer is hard work. There are many people will believe in your gift, and others will laugh in your face. I’m sure writers like Stephen King and J. K. Rowling were laughed at, but look at them now! I would LOVE to be on their level one day and even write for Huffington Post or a great company like it. Speaking of writing for a living, I have been applying to several writing jobs.  Now, I’ve worked as a writer before, but I am looking to do so on a full-time basis. If you read my plea for wanting a career as a writer, I was speaking for us all when I said we wanted to make it through our words. There are many jobs out there that writers can do. To name a few:

  • Content Writer
  • Staff Writer
  • Freelance Writer
  • Creative Writer
  • Fiction Writer
  • Screenwriter
  • TV Writer
  • Contributing Writer
  • Blog Writer
  • Journalist
  • Copywriter
  • Technical Writer

These are jobs that I have applied for in various companies. Let’s hope one of these turns out to be a winner. But, if not, I am still writing. My suggestion would be to ALWAYS write. The more you write, the better you will be become in your craft. But, there is one thing a writer should always do as well. That is to:

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A great writer is also a great reader. I LOVE to read as you know if you’ve been seeing my  Goodreads page, and book reviews. I watched a few interviews with Stephen King and he said that he reads all the time. It helps strengthen his writing.

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Writing is already a job within itself, but sometimes we have to get day jobs, too. I used to work full-time, go to school and STILL would write before I went to bed. Lately, I have been writing a lot of samples for the writing jobs that I have been applying for. My point is that writing should always be precedent if it’s something you plan on doing for the rest of your life. As for myself I want to be like Stephen King and just write for a living. In time I have no doubt that it won’t happen. I am going to re-read On Writing by Stephen King just to get inspiration to keep going. This journey can be a lonely road, but I will not stop climbing. If you want a writing job and to continue your own projects, keep striving. Don’t let or allow anyone to tell you differently.

Being Discouraged


Thursday

Hey readers! Happy Thursday! I know you are so excited for tomorrow and believe me, I am too. This week thus far really dragged for me. I was on the internet too much and got hardly any writing done. But, today I am back on it. I am gotten an accountability partner with my writing. I find that I work better on a schedule with someone knowing it. My accountability partners are Beth and Jennifer. I feel a weight lifted off of my shoulders now that I have them.

Discouraged

clear-your-mind-and-soul-of-negativity-step-04In my personal life I am still struggling to find a job. Well, today I applied for tons of writing jobs. I re-vamped my writing resume and now I’m hoping for the best. My goal is to work in research/writing field. Even if I’m a full-time writer of my own books that will be SO much fun and I can do research when I want. My dream is to be traditionally published. So, after I finish this next book, I will work on another project that I will get traditionally published.  But, life happens and it’s hard to stay positive. Maybe I am supposed to write for myself or work for myself. But, it’s hard to get that going when it is hard to get clients. I will keep trying. When you are discouraged just take a deep breath and keep trying to fulfill your dreams.