Hey readers! I want to add a new series on my blog, called Krystol Speaks. Here is a reader that had a question for me. Please let me know if you think I should continue this series on my blog. Read below!
Tell The Truth, Not What She Wants To Hear
This is not my normal blog post, but I was asked by a reader to give my two cents on something she is going through with a guy. Dating is hard for many people these no matter what age category you fall into. There have been so many horror stories and even successful ones on blogs and magazines of viewers sharing their stories. One of the things that have been complicated with dating is figuring where to meet a guy. Should one do online dating, call chat lines or the old – fashioned way where you dropped a piece of fruit in the aisle of a grocery store hoping for Mr. Right to pick it up. It could be kismet (or fate) as some call it. There are men who claim that they want the same things as you, but have no action behind it. It is starting to become bothersome and a waist of time. The truth will set you free.
Alley is a new reader of the Krystol Method and wanted some advice on her current situation with a guy named Ed. Of course, I said that I would help her in any way. She wanted other readers to give advice as well.
Alley’s story: Hey Krystol and readers, I am a journalist and I wanted to rekindle a flame from an ex of mine. He is a great guy, very grounded and stable as far as employment goes. He says he wants to be serious with me and be married and have children one day. This was great news to me because I am ready to settle down as I am in my mid thirties and ready for children. You see, Ed works two jobs as a mortician so his schedule is pretty much around the clock. We text more than we go out and talk on the phone. I am aware of his career, but what about the work life balance? I mentioned to him that I was excited, but worried if he had time for a relationship at all with his schedule. He told me that things would settle down in a while. I told him that it was fine, but I wanted to make sure that this was what he wanted. I stressed that I wanted consistency in our relationship especially if we were talking marriage and children. Then, things switched up. He said it was going to be hard because he did not think that he could be a consistent father. It really threw me for a loop because I am thinking, if he cannot be a consistent father, how can he be a consistent boyfriend or husband? Is Ed married to his work? I really do not know what to do. Krystol, please give me some advice. What are your thoughts?
My Advice to Alley: It seems that Ed really cares about you. There needs to be a balance between work and life on his part. Ed could be flipping the script because he is afraid. He may not know what he really wants, but knows he needs to make some moves with you. You guys have stayed friends and in contact this long. It could be for good reason. Sometimes men may tell us what we want to hear just to pacify us or to see if they can really feel that way in time. But, I get the feeling that Ed is a genuine guy. Freedom and moving quickly can be a lot to men who have not been in a relationship for a while. You have to work on being patient if he is whom you truly want. Now, I am not saying to settle. If he does not show you that he wants you when his schedule dies down then by all means keep dating other people. Ed needs to decide what he wants you to be in his life. Start off slow and get to know each other again and see what happens. This could be the start to something great.